How To Make More Girlfriends

How To Make More Girlfriends

A girl needs her squad. So many influencers and Instagram personalities seem to have unblemished lives filled with perfect friendships and relationships… That’s just not real. My circle of friends is -let’s call it- minimalistic.

But it’s hard to make truly great girlfriends nowadays! It’s even harder in “cliquey” cities like Vancouver. This is a town full of “It’s been so long! We should DEFINITELY catch up at some point in the next never!”. I have thousands of Instagram and Facebook “friends” but I may only have a half-dozen friends I see regularly and in person. It’s not just me, either. Researchers have found that people are collecting more acquaintances but don’t really have time for true friendships. We’re actually starting to get lonelier.

One big sign you need girlfriends is that you aren’t doing things you’d like to do (karaoke! bar trivia! a juice cleanse!) because you have no one to join you. This doesn’t mean that all of your buds have to be besties. Your gym pal may help you stay in shape, but you wouldn’t call her for a ride home from the airport. It can take any number of friends to fill the major roles: the listener, the cheerleader, the good-time gal, the shoulder to cry on. The one constant is you both want the best for each other. So what’s stopping you? Step up your friendship game with these tips. And you’re not that busy— stop rescheduling!

1. Say “yes” to invitations. If you say “no” too often to the same people, those peeps will stop inviting you. When a great romantic date ends, you’d never say, “We should do it again sometime,” and then let it go for three months. Why don’t your girlfriends get that same courtesy?

2. Invite at least one person per week to something you really want to do-brunch, an exercise class, or a concert if you have extra tickets and don’t give up!

3. Don’t be afraid to strike up a conversation. Something like “this line is killer!” or “where did you get your heels?” are great ways to start. It’s not a marriage proposal, it’s small talk and it’s perfectly OK. If the other person isn’t interested, fine. Sorry for being friendly.

4. Find a meet up group, I started one called Young Ambitious Women and have made some great girlfriends from it!

5. Attend events like alumni lunches, join a book club, take an interesting dance class. Associate yourself with people whose interests are similar to yours.

6. Find the influencers and connectors—girls who are publicists, recruiters, ladies who lunch…they love putting people in contact with each other. Plus, they know everyone.

Don’t give up on getting your dream squad! The right women will eventually come along and ride off into the sunset with you. It may take some work to get there, but all my lady loves have been worth the time.

  • Omg I love this post girl! Thanks so much for writing it. Living in LA where it’s clique-galore, I totally feel you in that it’s hard to make genuine good girl friends. I’ve been looking into joining a few meet-up groups to see if I can meet new people. I met a good friend off a site called as well but have to be careful on there because there are lots of weird people on there also… lol!

    • kandjasylla

      I’ll check that site out! But you should definitely try some meet ups, I’ve met a few super cool girls from those. Plus they usually have similar interests if you join a specific group… like a knitting club lol! xx

  • This is an AMAZING post!! And srsly so true. The date thing, but we can’t schedule time with our friends??? I will keep this list handy and try to incorporate this as much as possible. Love your blog girl!

    xo Andrea

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