How to be Confident: Your Bombshell Body

How to be Confident: Your Bombshell Body

Confidence doesn’t start with a six pack. Even so, most women would would kill to lose weight. Mostly because they think it will help them be confident. I, on the other hand, really resented being thin when I was younger. During my childhood, I was often bullied for being “too skinny”. To the point where boys would throw trash down my uniform shirts… Apparently because that’s what you get when you’re not wearing bras yet, like the other girls. Don’t ask me the logic behind this. Boys going through puberty are idiots.

Getting repetitively called a bag of bones or anorexic wasn’t great for my self-confidence either. Now I was, admittedly, quite an angular late bloomer. My time was wasted grossly overeating. I would scarf down calories hoping to gain some curves, or at least for gods sake, some boobs. I remember nights on end searching wikihow and Youtube, looking for answers to my body issues. Instead of finding some magic cure, I gave up (yay!).

Rather, I continued to focus on what I could control; being first in class, wrestling our 135lb ridgeback Mugabe on the trampoline and winning for once, making peanut butter cups from scratch. You know, the usual… Eventually, I grew into a great set of (small but respectable) tits, being proportionate, and bone structure that I could appreciate. Being a gangly string bean just came with that territory.

Looking back through the years, I realize that I never should have let anyone say I should look or be different. Duh. Including myself. But that’s so much easier said than done. Happiness honestly starts from acceptance. Because with acceptance you start loving yourself more each day. Now, I live my life with my priority being happiness and health, and I feel more confident than ever!

*And I know I turned out tall and lean. So it may seem easier for me to feel confident, or talk about body love. But I promise you I have dealt, am dealing, and will probably deal with physical insecurities. Nonetheless, the following tips always help me feel (and look) great- AND ignore the haters! Especially when they’re me:

Achieving Body Confidence

How to be Confident

Pretty Weird Bombshell

How to be confident- Pretty Weird Bombshell


How to be Confident- Pretty Weird Bombshell

How to be Confident

How to be Confident: Bringing out your inner bombshell

Pamper yourself

Feeling beautiful has a lot to do with taking good care of yourself. Devote time every week to giving yourself some good loving. Put it in your schedule if you have to! There are a myriad of ways to feel pampered without breaking the bank. Run yourself a hot bath with some DIY bath bombs. Pluck your eyebrows, go for a jog, paint your nails, or even hit up your favourite yoga studio.

Spend 10 minutes positively focusing on your differences.

Set a gentle timer and think about the pros of your insecurities (instead of the cons like usual). Smaller breasts are less prone to breast cancer. Vitiligo is mesmerizing to look at. Beauty is NOT tantamount to perfection. Your flaws and quirks don’t make you any less beautiful. On the contrary, they are blessings. You just need to take the time to see those blessings.


A smile is the most underrated accessory you can wear. Aside from making you more attractive, smiling changes your attitude. Being beautiful is feeling good inside and out. Keep in mind that every time you wear a smile, you not only give your self-esteem a boost, keep your positive aura up, and feel awesome about yourself. You also make others around you feel good too!

Focus on your soul.

Being intelligent or kind can make you feel sexy and can help you be confident. Attitude has a lot to do with being confident. By showing genuine compassion to everyone (including animals), you improve how you see yourself. Being a kind person makes you feel that you matter and you can really make a difference. Whenever I need a confidence boost I try to do something nice for someone, even if it’s my dog Mosi.
Likewise, intelligence can also make you feel sexy. Any sapiosexuals out there? 😉 Seriously, though, beauty doesn’t have to rely on physical features alone; intelligence is just as attractive.

Eat well.

Taking care of yourself also means feeding your body with organic, clean, and healthy food. Eating fruits and vegetables regularly can help you look good and feel good. Nutrition plays an important role in how you function inside and how you look outside. The vitamins and minerals absorbed by your body through your diet will make your hair, nails, and skin look healthy and glowing unlike any other cosmetic product. Eating your veggies can indeed make you feel like a bombshell from top to toe!

Feeling beautiful outside starts from embracing your own self, realizing your self-worth and knowing how to be confident. To look good to others, you have to first love your own beauty—and that starts by being satisfied with yourself.

How to be Confident

Be Confident!



  • Girl, this post really hit home for me. Even though I have blogged about confidence before, I still struggle with it at times. Even though I am a healthy weight, I still sometimes feel like I could “Just lose 7 lbs”. I have been guilty of starving myself and depleting my body of energy to lose weight. Which I admit with a heavy heart. I love the perspective you give on the “other side” about being bullied being too skinny, etc. First of all, I am incredibly sorry that you ever had to go through that. No one should ever feel judged or ridiculed regarding their body. You are beautiful no matter what shape or size you are. Your heart is what makes you beautiful. <3 God, I needed this post today.

    • Thank you for your kind reaching out Chelsea… And I’m sorry to hear that you’ve been guilted into treating your body like that, mistreatment I recognize myself all too well! I think every woman has issues with body confidence. But the fact that you can be open with your struggle is beautiful 🙂 I truly believe it’s healing for women to hear other women’s confidence issues. Instead of being told to accept themselves fully in a Maybelline world, and then guilted when they can’t. xx Enjoy your weekend! And enjoy your gorgeousness! You are young, and talented and fabulous and alive!!!

      • Aw. You are the sweetest. I loved that last sentence. Thank you, my dear. I’m very grateful for our connection!!

  • Love this post! It’s one of those ‘feel good’ posts. I think it’s so important to be confident and that truly shows through your photos. Love your blog!
    PS. Thank you for responding to my email! = )

    – Jasmine K

    • Thanks for the love Jasmine! 🙂 And I wish I could help you more with growing instagram… It’s a painful, dedicated process to grow your brand. But on the bright side you have a wonderful blog! And with consistency your work will speak for itself! xx

  • Style hue

    You got some great advice girl 🙂 Definitely acceptance is key. Hahha I had some awkward teen years too, and being your own cheer leader/ best friend is really key to a happy life. And yeah eat your veggies like you said and spend some time investing in your body.
    I’m currently swimming, but I want to start jogging again and maybe some yoga. I used to go 2 a week, but find that the classes are so full lately that it’s not even fun


    • Come to yoga with me! The classes at Yyoga are always excellent 🙂

  • Some fantastic advice and you’re absolutely right, confidence starts from within and getting fit is great for your mind, body and soul. You look fantastic and it’s so important to work out daily (allowing days of rest of course) eating well by putting goodness in to your body to nourish it.

    Lovely post and you look stunning!

    Laura xo

    • I for sure feel completely different when I treat my body well through food and exercise! Thanks for stopping by Laura 🙂 Enjoy the week ahead beautiful!! x

  • You look amazing in this suit! Love all your advice.

    • Thanks Katherine! It was kind of uncomfortable to shoot, but I just brought my bombshell out. LOL 🙂

  • Without sounding too creepy, my body is similar to yours. I’m rather tall & lean, small breasts, long legs etc. So I get where the comments come from, about having to eat more/looking too skinny etc. Being told that people prefer more curves and fat. Well, guess what, not my problem what others prefers when it comes to MY body. The only ideal that should exists is the one where people are complete and utterly comfortable in their bodies, regardless of what they look like. So hands down that you brought this up girl, I can definitely relate and I think we bloggers need to use the platform we have to bring up different aspects of the body issues and how you can change them.

    Have the best week gorgeous! Xx

  • No one seems to make it through childhood being unscathed. You are beautiful and have every reason to be confident.

    Amy Ann
    Straight A Style

  • Great advice babe! It’s true confidence really does come from accepting yourself. But I will be the first to admit it’s easier said than done. Loving yourself is something that has to be done everyday. I love your suggestion of taking 10 minutes every day to focus positively on your differences. Great way to remind yourself of the things that make you unique and beautiful! Thanks for sharing!
    By the way, you look amazing! Totally Killing it in your bikini🔥

    xo, jackie

  • I was often insecure because of height and color. Here in east asia, people are particularly partial towards westerners. Thanks for the tips! I’ll try my best to keep them in mind 🙂

  • Monika

    It’s pretty amazing how most of our stories are so similar.. We may have different versions but in the end, all of us in some or the other way have experienced body shaming. And what’s even more amazing is seeing all gorgeous girls like you coming forward to talk about it and empowering our/future generation to feel strong and confident in their own skin. You did turn out to be super strong and gorgeous babe :* And not just gorgeous outside but a super beautiful person from inside who exudes confidence and quirkiness. Thank you for sharing this post. One of my fav post of yours <3

    Monika |

  • As someone who recovered from a decade of anorexia, I still find it odd when people compliment me or anyone else on the shape of their body. Same goes for just general judgment, but people (especially kids) are cruel beings. When someone says to me “You’re so skinny!” I almost physically cringe. Yeah, it’s a compliment in their eyes, but for me it just feels like such an odd thing to comment on. Like, you might as well tell me “Your big toe is so round!”

    I’m proud to be at a point where I can go about my day without thinking about my shape at all. My food decisions aren’t based on calories- they’re based on nutritional stability.This took years of nutritional coaching and 3 intensive months in a full-time recovery facility. I was forced to look at myself every day and remind myself that I’m beautiful. I participated in groups where I complimented other girls on their personality and on their accomplishments. I know that my case is at the extreme end of body dissatisfaction, but the point I’m trying to make is: if we all start focusing on each others’ accomplishments, we’ll start appreciating the true value in us.

    One of the things that I heard in my recovery that really stuck out to me is something super simple: Do you really think anyone else cares about your pants size? Do you really think, when you walk out the door that someone will value you based on what number you wear? No- because they’re all thinking about their own damn pants size. Everyone is absorbed in their own number they carry. So get out of the dark and start measuring things that matter. It is SO incredibly freeing never to have to compare myself to another body size. It honestly feels incredible. That doesn’t mean I don’t have my moments when I think I should lose a few lbs here or there. It happens- but don’t lose yourself in the comparison to what you think the “norm” body size is. You’ll lose out on a lot of life.

    Style Tomes ||ST on IG

  • Maria Jose Abad

    I love this post and love that you’re always such a confident, happy woman! We need to be, looks aren’t everything. You always need to be comfortable with yourself and love yourself!
    MariaOnPoint | Find me on IG

  • kierra

    It is all so important to love yourself. I you are not happy make the changes and they will slowly come. I am in the mix of dieting because I am not happy with my body. I just need to lose some weight. Many people say I look good and I don’t need to which I’m happy to hear it but I have to make me happy first. It is so important to be happy and confident with yourself.

    What a wonderful post girl.

  • You are gorgeous! Beautiful photos and I absolutely agree with your tips!

    xo, Jennifer

  • Amy

    You are truly gorgeous inside and out Kandja! Everyone and I mean EVERYONE has insecurities about their bodies – so thank you for this positive message and helpful tips!! Also, many people would kill to be long and lean like you 😉 keep on rocking it gril!

    xx, Amy

  • Wow you are smokin’ gorgeous. Beautiful photos and thank you for these tips xx

  • Marie Rimmer

    Great tips, yes it is important to take good care of yourself.

  • Bonnie McConaughy

    So true! Confidence comes from within, not because of what’s on the outside. Thinking about what makes us beautiful and unique individuals each day can certainly boost our confidence and that is something we have complete control over!

  • Bianca Sasha

    So true that confidence comes from wasn’t until I realized this that I was able to start exuding true confidence!

  • I love this, girl! Gorgeous photoshoot, too! It’s really important that all girls regardless of size remind themselves of these things – I appreciate you touching on your societally-deemed physical attractiveness and how this doesn’t mean you don’t deal with body image issues either. You rock, girlboss! 🙂

    xo Kathryn

  • Amanda Mason

    This is a great article! I can relate – I’m 37 and a size 2. People give me crap all the time for being so small but hey I take care of myself…I’m in the gym 5 days a week and I eat well and I feel fantastic! Great post!

  • Josephine Amoako

    Very true! You look beautiful when you love and pamper yourself. I’m so glad I read this! Thanks for sharing.

  • Toyas Tales

    Great motivational post. Confidence is the key to success. It is a process accepting who we are and what makes us uniquely but the bumpy journey is worth the ride.

  • Kimberly @ Berly’s Kitchen

    You’ve included some great tips in your post. Confidence is something that has always taken a lot of work for me, so this will come in helpful.

  • You look fantastic! I think taking the time to pamper yourself is so important for your happiness and wellbeing and a smile will always disarm your critics! Great tips for body confidence girl!


  • Alya Mooro

    Love this post! You look amazing!!

    moorizZLA xx

  • How to be confident: have Kandja’s hot bod! LOL jokes aside, I totally agree with all the points you’ve made here babe! Especially pampering yourself hehe I love taking warm baths! xo, sharon

  • I too was incredibly skinny growing up and people would tell me I was anorexic. I was not and wished desperately to put on weight. After 25, the weight definitely came and it’s not going anywhere. Age catches up with you for sure! So you gotta be happy within yourself because you never know what’s gonna happen with your body.

    xx Yasmin

  • This is well said, my friend! And you are completely gorgeous – beautiful smile that definitely radiates confidence! Love your blog, babe! xoxo

  • love your honesty about growing up but who’s laughing now? the confident, gorgeous, strong woman with respectable tits! also, I love this spot that you took these photos. my old neighborhood!

  • brownpaperdoll

    I loved this post… so refreshing! You’re totally right that we can be our own worst critics and happiness starts from within. Thanks for your beauty and positivity lady! xo, LA

  • Kelly Alex

    Loved this post! Everyone has insecurities but it is important to be confident with what you are born with and your body is amazing !!

  • I am lucky to have high metabolism for most of my life. I eat and eat whatever crap I want and I don’t gain weight. Age definitely slowed my metabolism down, hell I’ll be 38 end January but with yoga 4 times a week, I can still get away with eating whatever I want. Fingers crossed. LOL!

    Shireen | Reflection of Sanity

  • Such a beautiful post! I love the message! It’s so hard not to get caught up in the wishing and wanting of what other people have! I love your positive attitude as always and I’ll try and give myself a little more self love!

  • I love this message! I used to be teased for being tiny too, and some people still even bring it up in conversation so it’s an ongoing process of self-love and not letting the haters (or well-meaning friends) get to you!

    Chow Down USA

  • Girl you are beautiful INSIDE and OUT! I can’t believe you got bullied – but I guess it makes us stronger! I also got bullied when I was in primary school but I guess it contributes to how you are shaped as a person and you’re just beautiful!

    Helen xx

  • You are so beautiful! I am so glad you have found acceptance as a way to bring you happiness and hold on to the fact that no one can bring you down! Thanks for sharing the inspiring post!

    Keep smiling!
    Molly |

  • Love this post! You are beautiful as you are!
    So inspiring!
    Richa | Fancier’s World

  • You are gorgeous girl!! I went through the same thing in school… except that I was short and curvy. I always wanted to be long and lean, but that’s just not my body type and I has to learn how to accept that. These are great tips for those times when you forget to love yourself 🙂