Confidence doesn’t start with a six pack. Even so, most women would would kill to lose weight. Mostly because they think it will help them be confident. I, on the other hand, really resented being thin when I was younger. During my childhood, I was often bullied for being “too skinny”. To the point where boys would throw trash down my uniform shirts… Apparently because that’s what you get when you’re not wearing bras yet, like the other girls. Don’t ask me the logic behind this. Boys going through puberty are idiots.
Getting repetitively called a bag of bones or anorexic wasn’t great for my self-confidence either. Now I was, admittedly, quite an angular late bloomer. My time was wasted grossly overeating. I would scarf down calories hoping to gain some curves, or at least for gods sake, some boobs. I remember nights on end searching wikihow and Youtube, looking for answers to my body issues. Instead of finding some magic cure, I gave up (yay!).
Rather, I continued to focus on what I could control; being first in class, wrestling our 135lb ridgeback Mugabe on the trampoline and winning for once, making peanut butter cups from scratch. You know, the usual… Eventually, I grew into a great set of (small but respectable) tits, being proportionate, and bone structure that I could appreciate. Being a gangly string bean just came with that territory.
Looking back through the years, I realize that I never should have let anyone say I should look or be different. Duh. Including myself. But that’s so much easier said than done. Happiness honestly starts from acceptance. Because with acceptance you start loving yourself more each day. Now, I live my life with my priority being happiness and health, and I feel more confident than ever!
*And I know I turned out tall and lean. So it may seem easier for me to feel confident, or talk about body love. But I promise you I have dealt, am dealing, and will probably deal with physical insecurities. Nonetheless, the following tips always help me feel (and look) great- AND ignore the haters! Especially when they’re me:
How to be Confident: Bringing out your inner bombshell
Feeling beautiful has a lot to do with taking good care of yourself. Devote time every week to giving yourself some good loving. Put it in your schedule if you have to! There are a myriad of ways to feel pampered without breaking the bank. Run yourself a hot bath with some DIY bath bombs. Pluck your eyebrows, go for a jog, paint your nails, or even hit up your favourite yoga studio.
Spend 10 minutes positively focusing on your differences.
Set a gentle timer and think about the pros of your insecurities (instead of the cons like usual). Smaller breasts are less prone to breast cancer. Vitiligo is mesmerizing to look at. Beauty is NOT tantamount to perfection. Your flaws and quirks don’t make you any less beautiful. On the contrary, they are blessings. You just need to take the time to see those blessings.
A smile is the most underrated accessory you can wear. Aside from making you more attractive, smiling changes your attitude. Being beautiful is feeling good inside and out. Keep in mind that every time you wear a smile, you not only give your self-esteem a boost, keep your positive aura up, and feel awesome about yourself. You also make others around you feel good too!
Focus on your soul.
Being intelligent or kind can make you feel sexy and can help you be confident. Attitude has a lot to do with being confident. By showing genuine compassion to everyone (including animals), you improve how you see yourself. Being a kind person makes you feel that you matter and you can really make a difference. Whenever I need a confidence boost I try to do something nice for someone, even if it’s my dog Mosi.
Likewise, intelligence can also make you feel sexy. Any sapiosexuals out there? 😉 Seriously, though, beauty doesn’t have to rely on physical features alone; intelligence is just as attractive.
Taking care of yourself also means feeding your body with organic, clean, and healthy food. Eating fruits and vegetables regularly can help you look good and feel good. Nutrition plays an important role in how you function inside and how you look outside. The vitamins and minerals absorbed by your body through your diet will make your hair, nails, and skin look healthy and glowing unlike any other cosmetic product. Eating your veggies can indeed make you feel like a bombshell from top to toe!
Feeling beautiful outside starts from embracing your own self, realizing your self-worth and knowing how to be confident. To look good to others, you have to first love your own beauty—and that starts by being satisfied with yourself.
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